Since day one, I have been an individualist. I choose those things in my life which my instinct dictates. Be it friends, job, hobbies, activities, thoughts, Just about anything. But the world is full of conformists, who choose to put me in some ‘group’ all the time.
Note: absolutely not my choice.
It always makes me wonder why! If the world is already saturated with confirmists, who stick by their rule book, Why should it bother them at all to find a stray individual who drifts from the norm? If my individualist rule book allows me to manage my life without interfering in any group, why should the conformist’s even bother about my existance?
A few episodes I can think of are:
‘Being a Brahmin’ : Why raise those eyebrows at the word ‘Brahmin’. It’s a sect like the innumerable ones all over India or anywhere abroad. But still this one particular term never fails to grab all the wrong attention. People who never met me earlier now have a full blown picture in their mind about me just by the mention of the word tam Bram. Excuse me- Its like saying-“Oh your name is also Lakshmi- mine too..we are the same then!”
Next in line giving GRE while in undergrad:
Once word gets around that you are planning to give your GRE. You are suddenly viewed as an irresponsible person who no longer cares about your grades or record work. A person whose bound to bunk classes. To my knowledge the importance I gave to record work ever since school was just -‘complete it and get done’. This was my view even before GRE popped up but suddenly it’s an offense. As far as bunking college goes, Its always been there, people probably didn’t notice it earlier and now it’s a red alert.
Another one, is the notion- that NRE’s are heartless:
NRE’s obviously don’t care about their parents. They prefer their individual space and keep away from family. Money is the only thing they see. Those were the common comments I heard. Fine, so be it. Only- I think that’s the same case with everyone who is at home. Everyone –age no bar- sex no bar, all have this urge to find their own space. It has nothing to do with ‘care and concern’.
After all my trips between India and US,there are some things that just have not changed here in US. It urges me to say ‘grow up’. Oh yes – Now it’s the flip side of the tape.( By the way, growing up is not about iphones and better cars)
There is always a lot on India’s hindu- muslim conflict that seem to be broadcasted in all the channels. What I don’t see is why isn’t the discrimination between an American and Indian not broadcasted. Is that because Indians choose to be passive and ignore looks and remarks while they attempt to themselves change magically into American’s or because they are the minority or because they are tired after a long day and have no energy to hold their head high.
After 10 years of observation, I still find the American – Indian relation terribly strained in most cases. I enter a class with my son when no one is around- The teacher greets me politely. The next day I enter the class along with a few other parents and I see the greeting is valid only for the natives not the others!
On a cruise in the Carribean I found several Indian’s. Some were Chef, some were in the Captains crew, some were cleaning up. Name it and Indians were there. Talk to them- the one thing I could sense was, they would rather work in a lesser designation and have an ordinary profile in USA and project that they are ‘well off’ to people back in India, than take up a higher designation in India. For some reason the aura of prestige is associated with ‘Living in America’.
Why can’t a person just be as- is and not be fitted into all these imaginary groups. Why can’t the conformist’s rest in peace.
